In the framework of the project "Smart environment" discussed topics of a personal crisis. Speakers at the event spoke head of the Department in clinic of neurosises "the Pine forest", the teacher of the course "self-Management" Oleg Kuzin, the Chairman of the Regional branch of the National forum of psychoanalysis and the Chairman of the Ethical Committee of the European Confederation of psychoanalytic psychotherapy (in Russian) Georgy Amusin, associate Professor of the Department of philosophy of the Ural Federal University Alexey Loginov and business coach Paul Isaikin.
What is an identity crisis and can it be avoided?
George AmusinIf to speak simply, is the personal crisis suggests that the person who has become or wants to become a personality, do not have any internal resources. A crisis is fine, he goes with us all his life.
As a therapist I will say one thing: do not pass details, feel like you are going through such condition. Try to track what is a provocateur of the crisis. We are all fortunate to have you, we live in a time when crises are literally all around us.
Is it possible to live without crises? Impossible. Is the writer Isaac Asimov, who wrote "the Academy". This work is dedicated to group psychology, it is studied the us military is mandatory. The bottom line is this: people comes a scientist and says: "Your company is waiting for the crisis", he is asked how much this crisis will last, and he said, "30 thousand years". Then the scientist asked: "And what this crisis can be done?", he says that the crisis can be reduced to one thousand years. Morality works is this: there is a crisis, he will face everyone, but we can live it with dignity, not sprawling, not pushing himself to death.
So in an identity crisis, you can join easily, and worry it will adequately help the specialist. I am not against introspection, but is convinced that "the correct word to yourself you will not say."
Can specialist damage? I'm trying to remember when I'm helping someone messed up life... don't remember. But if, after working with me decided to go my way, become a psychoanalyst, it says that my work is not done. Because such a solution suggests that either they want to compete with me, or they did not have enough communication with me.
Oleg Kuzin: I would say that the crisis is an emotional experience collisions with surprise when our view of the world at odds with reality.
Start a personal crisis or some life situation or crisis can be planned.
If about the first situation is more or less clear, about the planned crisis need to tell us more. For example, the man lived and he had certain expectations: to a certain age by a certain deadline I have to have specific achievements. And here comes the period, the person asks the question: "And what have I achieved?". At this point he may suddenly understand that he came not quite to the point, which is sought, although his path was smooth.
If we are alive, we will constantly face crises, the only question is how deep they would swallow us. A crisis is stressful, and every man able to discern that he is on the verge of crisis.
For example, for men a clear indicator of increased aggression, and for women is more characteristic of the state of loneliness. These pre-crisis state it is possible to catch enough to listen to yourself and your emotions.
There is an assumption that to increase protivokrazhnogo immunity, it is helpful to turn to their beliefs in the hypothesis, that is, not to insist on their world view, and to be prepared for the fact that your view of the world at any time can confirm or deny.
Overcoming the crisis is to manage. It is important to realize what is happening to you, ask yourself the questions: "Why am I in this or that situation?" and so on. Understanding why we take certain decisions, allows us to cope with crises.
Very often, faced with a crisis, people say, "I'm a therapist don't go because you don't want me to decide something". Funny people, the therapist will not be anything for you to solve. Specialist is not required if the person is able to perform its behavior, and decision-making algorithms and, most importantly, ask yourself the question: "Why are you doing this?".
Paul Isaikin: In my understanding, the crisis is just a illusion. When we insist on the illusion in which you live, and don't accept the reality. And the ancient Greeks right in saying that in crisis there is nothing wrong, because it is the step that allows us to abandon misconceptions, outdated picture of the world. So the only way to avoid identity crises — not illusions.
The simplest example of a crisis are described as follows: desperation runs our aspiration. That is, when we see that our hopes are far from reality, we have started the process of disappointment. But let's not forget that not disappointed one who is not fascinated. We create your illusions, and depending on how far we are from reality, it is the deep our crisis.
The cause of the crisis is our social roles, the social mask that we in the course of a lifetime receive. We were taught how to be proper adults how to live a worthy life. And very often, after ending the period of childhood, we find ourselves in a deception: "it's not like we were told."
In childhood we were taught to wait our expectations worked because to dream you just had to wait for a birthday, and then as time went on and our expectations are never met by 100%. The more people break expectations with reality, the more likely the onset of the crisis. Mature man usually idle very mundane, adequate, and therefore, the number of crises it is reduced to a minimum.
The presence of a protest, failure to accept change is the cause of crises. The ability to make quick changes to learn is leadership ability, it allows you to avoid identity crises.
Is there a characteristic of the crises of today?
Oleg Kuzin: We see that it is very often recorded in people of panic disorder, panic attacks. The reason for this growth? In my opinion, due to the fact that before people knew how the rest of their lives for the next 10-15 years. School, University, work distribution, purchase VAZ-2105 and so on. That is, before the planning horizon averaged 15 years. Everything is clear and stable. In addition, people had the habit to rely on the stability of the external environment.
But the current environment is difficult to define stability, some experts call today's time-history. We have events are not repeated, and the habit to seek stability in outside left. In this situation, the man just starts to panic when making decisions.
Paul Isaikin: In my opinion, the ability to learn at any age and the ability to make changes to avoid any identity crisis. As soon as people lose interest in life, lose the ability to learn, they age. I've seen people become old and at the age of 20 and 70.
Today, many faculties have become unnecessary, and skill requirements change, the definition of value also transformered. What was important an hour ago, in the second may not have any value. Of course, people are starting to act up, because life becomes too fast.
Alexey Loginov: For me the specificity of our time is the first — the pace of life and the second transformation of the fundamental success criteria. The answer to the question: "What must a man do to feel successful?" has changed dramatically over the past 30 years. And third — we have more realities. I mean that we now have virtual reality, and many accounts in different social networks where we can behave differently. So the identity crisis is very acute today.
George Amusin: the fact that to describe the crisis era is problematic, but we can see how age affects the personal crises of people. For example, after the revolution of 1917 raised the research data doctors and told that for 15-16 years before the revolution began to appear individual and group forms of psychopathology, increased their number. Now conducted the same research but to draw Parallels between the types of personal crises and age is very difficult.
Now experts say that the main pathologies are: first, the narcissistic pathology that is associated with the fact that the man closed in himself and it is difficult to compromise, it is difficult to find a partner, in the end, he breaks the bond with the family and the future.
Another characteristic of today's pathologies — aggressiveness. And finally, the third modern pathology — immaturity. And we have many people today consider the identity crisis as the cash crisis is a symptom of time. They say, "Give me some money and it will solve all my problems". Nothing of the sort.
How to prepare for the crisis and overcome it?
Alexey Loginov : If you make some fundamental decisions regarding their behavior, then, actually, life is lived easier. If you lined up inside the hierarchy of values, something in life you go it will be much easier in the sense that you will be less to think about. If you have taken the decision not to drink alcohol, then you will have no issues Friday night and every other day: to drink or not to drink. That is, you clearly describe yourself, what is good and what is bad, and you live according to this coordinate system, giving no failures.
It is a variant of fanatical behavior with a minimum of thinking, because to think about when making decisions you do not need, you have developed patterns of behavior. Sounds good, but I, as a philosopher, the question arises: and what if this man is from the personality, if it gets built? Where is the place of reflection?
Paul Isaikin: the Ability to survive a crisis is directly related to the degree of maturity of the individual. We often today it happens. Man lives like a child, having fun, and then has his children, and his life becomes a memory. Read, learn, grow up, develop yourself to help survive in crisis. The most terrible is infantylny passivity.
George Amusin: If you understand that crisis is inevitable, it is possible to spread a straw. How to prepare for infectious disease? Hardened and vaccinations. Our upbringing and education should prepare for crisis. If education aims at the recognition of the existence of crises and you are ready for this, then go and get out of the crisis will be easy. If mommy and daddy didn't frame the child in crisis, and helping them, then everything is fine. If in the process of education, which is one big crisis, a man helped friends, acquaintances, and other people, then he has a crisis index.
Training crisis index is a good option for training. Something to work with in the first place? Emotional stability and the ability to communicate.
If you are able to look at their actions and their life is purposeful and active position, you will not have problems with the recovery from the crisis.
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